Andrew & Andrew
“Our promise to our birth mom is that this child will ALWAYS be loved unconditionally.”
Ages: 35 and 39
Other Kids: 1 daughter
Preferences: Bi or Multi-Racial, Either Gender, Infant
Our time together: We were introduced by mutual friends in 2009 and have been together since. In 2005 we were married surrounded by friends and family and in 2016 our daughter, Olivia, was born. Our time together has been anything but typical, but we have a tremendous amount of gratitude for our stories as individuals and as a couple. Both of us have very different backgrounds, however, we’re both firm believers in being the sum of all the events of our lives. One of us was raised in a military family and lived all over the world growing up, while the other was born and raised in the same city with the majority of his family. As individuals and as a couple we’ve faced adverse situations as well as an abundance of blessings and privilege. All of this, the good, the bad, the ups and downs that life offers have shaped us to the people we are today. As a couple and later as a family, our story has been anything but typical. Over the course of our years together, we’ve lived in two different cities while one finished a doctoral degree, then work took us on a cross country move from St. Louis to Los Angeles, and later back to St. Louis. We were blessed with our first daughter with no notice and became instant parents on the day she was born. As a couple, we’ve faced some significant hurdles, but been rewarded with wonderful rewards as well. Because of this, we’ve learned how to navigate all life has to offer. We both carry a tremendous amount of gratitude and appreciation for the blessings we have, and this ideology is shared throughout our friends and family. Having this gratitude for all of life’s events has allowed us really to remain strong in our faith and feel secure in our lives. We’re always excited for the future and what it holds and, in our minds, the thought of growing our family is a huge part of that future.
Our current family: We have a daughter who is two years old whom we adopted at birth. Both of us always knew we wanted to have a family but being two men, we came into the process much differently than a traditional couple. Because having a biological child of our own was never an option, adoption was always a joyful and exciting possibility for us. Knowing the process would be something we had to plan and arrange gave us time to ensure our lives were in the best spot to start a family and to be sure we could give the absolute best to any children we had. We both were blessed with large, supportive and loving families. We were provided for and really felt we were given wonderful traits from our parents and family. Being able to have a family of our own with whom to share this love and support has always been a goal of ours. Our daughter absolutely changed our lives in more ways than we could ever imagine. In her short time she has shown us so many possibilities of what a family can be. Watching her grow, getting to teach her, and love her, and the bond she has with all of our friends and family has been more joy than words can express. Because both of us come from large families, we really want her to have a sibling, or even two. Although there isn’t anything we wouldn’t do for our children, we understand there is a special bond that only siblings can share. We also really love the idea of two adoptive children being able to grow up together. While each of their paths is different, we really feel having such a unique family will be really special and something our children can celebrate and be proud of. Olivia is surrounded by other kiddos from family to close friends, but you can always tell she’s a little bummed when it’s time for everyone to go their own ways. She’s already a very nurturing sweetheart and loves to play older sister with her dolls. Because many of the children in our circle have siblings, she’s already talked about having a little brother or sister. We have no doubt she’s as ready to be a big sister as we are to be parents.
Family Traditions: We both are so lucky to have many family traditions. We both come from very close-knit families. Additionally both of our families really care for one another and so often for holidays or gatherings, we can all come together. Holidays and special events are usually large events surrounded by all of our family and friends. Christmas dinner is still prepared in one our childhood homes and sometimes includes almost 50 family members. We recently moved into our forever home and have begun the tradition of hosting Thanksgiving dinner for our family as well. It was a tradition we took on from our grandparents and hope to continue doing it until we have grandchildren of our own who will carry on this tradition. The wonderful thing about our family is our closeness. Although a few people live outside our community, no one is more than a few hours away which means birthdays, holidays or any other special events include the majority of the family. With regular visits from grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins, our children will have no shortage of family as they grow up in our house.
Culture: Culture diversity has always been really important to us as individuals. We both have made conscious efforts to be exposed to as much diversity as possible in our communities. As a family we have a huge circle of friends and community from different backgrounds and cultures. After the birth of our first child, this became even more important to us. Our first daughter is multiracial and with a large birth family of Latin decent. As we intend to be transparent and open with our children about their lives and their backgrounds, it was important for our first daughter to have exposure to her biological roots. She attends a private Spanish immersion school which is taught completely in Spanish, by a diverse group of Latin born educators. As a result, we have formed strong bonds with other multicultural families in our community. As parents we are committed to immersing our children in a diverse community, one that not only embraces their biological makeup, but also exposes them to a wide array of diversity outside of our family. As parents we believe acceptance and love for the world around us is the cornerstone of the skillset we want to offer our children, so immersion in a diverse community helps offer this foundation. It offers the ability to show them all the world has to offer as well as teach empathy for those around them.
Our promise: Our promise to our birth mom is that this child will ALWAYS be loved unconditionally. We feel as adoptive parents, we have more responsibility than anyone else to ensure this child is loved, accepted, and given every opportunity that life can offer. Being given the gift of a child from a birth mom means that we can never forget we were picked to offer this child the best possible life. As adoptive parents, we never lose sight of what a precious decision this is and that we can’t for one day take it for granted. We know everyone’s circumstances are different, so we aren’t sure what path will bring our child to us. However, we know that however this child finds us, we have a responsibility for the rest of our lives to honor that decision.