Answers for Birth-mothers from Birth-Mothers
I have reached out to some of my previous birth-mothers. I want them to help me empower any expectant mother who comes across our web or Facebook page that is considering adoption for their baby. It doesn’t get more real than asking another birth mother who has been through the adoption process.
Here are some of the top questions we asked our former birth mothers along with their replies.
Why did you choose adoption for your baby?
I knew for a fact I could not go through with an abortion. I also knew that I could not care for an infant or raise a baby at that point in my life. People think you choose adoption because you don’t want your baby, but for me it is that I wanted her so much, I wanted to give her life. A good life. – Britany
The truth is, financially there was no way I could give my child the things he needed or deserves. I was and still am a single mother trying to do my best with two other children. I wanted to give him two parents that could care for him and give him the things I could not. I chose a couple for my baby that had been struggling with infertility for years. I felt and still feel good about my decision to place my baby with them. We have a wonderful open adoption. I communicate with them often and get plenty of pictures and updates. – Jennifer
What was the adoption process like during your pregnancy?
I had researched agencies and different law offices. I called around and went with your office because I got a warm and kind voice who answered all my questions. I met with your caseworker whom immediately put me at ease letting me know I would have support along the way and that I could make my own adoption plan. I could choose the adoptive parents and the kind of communication I wanted with them. I was very emotional and would say somewhat difficult throughout my pregnancy because of my situation. You never made me feel pressured or judged me. The respect and love I got from your staff were exactly what I felt I deserved throughout my pregnancy and after I placed my child. – Amanda
You all helped me from the start. Getting my pregnancy Medicaid, food stamps, helping me find an OB/GYN that was close to my house for my prenatal visits and giving me great family profiles to choose from. Having a case worker to call upon for help whenever I needed was great too. When you choose adoption you also get financial assistance which helped me get back on my feet during and after I placed my baby. I asked you to be there with me at the hospital and there was no hesitation. I felt I got all the support I needed. The counseling I got afterwards was important for me as well. I would say that I had a very good adoption experience. You all made the process a lot easier for me. – Courtney
What would you tell a birth mother considering adoption?
It is not an easy decision, but you are giving your baby a life. You are also giving a family who wants and desires to care for and love a child a grand gift. I would also say, make sure you don’t get mislead by people giving you negative advice about adoption. Educate yourself about the process. Choose a family that you feel you have a connection with. That makes the whole thing so much easier. When I receive my pictures along with the letter with the updates on my child, I feel good in my heart that he is happy and healthy with a loving family that is giving him everything I could not. – Sarah
I was not ready to be a mom. My boyfriend and I were very young and unstable. People and family around us offered help but we knew all too well we would have to be responsible adults to care for a child. At that time, we were not. I thought about abortion and almost went through with it. I also did seek out some resources before my boyfriend and I made the decision together to move forward with adoption. Till this day, I am glad I did. After we placed our baby, I used it as a stepping stone to get my life together. I went back to school and got my degree. – Dee
What went into your choice in picking an adoptive family?
The main factor in me choosing an adoptive family was that they would be comfortable with the type of openness I wanted. I also really liked how their profile showed their personality, the type of life style they live and their interests. After looking at several profiles, I chose the family that I felt I had more in common with. After we had a conversation on the phone and we met over lunch, I knew I made the right choice. – Jen
I did not know at first what I wanted in a family. After looking at several profiles, I went with things I would have liked for myself growing up. A pet, a couple that travels at least once a year and a couple that seemed like they shared the same interests with each other like sports and religion. I also wanted to choose a couple that did not have any other children. A couple that would really be touched and impacted by my choice in choosing them to raise my baby. – Dee
My child’s adoptive parents look happy together in their profile. They showed they were very family oriented and had a good support in family and friends around them. They are outdoorsy which is how I grew up. Camping, sporting events, concerts. I found this to be the connection I was looking for. Their profile was detailed and really showed what their life was like. – A
Are you considering adoption and have questions and/or concerns you would like to ask and actual birth mother that has placed their baby for adoption through our office? Call, text or email us and we will put you in touch with an actual birth mother that can answer your questions. We are here to help, support and educate you. We will give you the respect and support you deserve.